2007-12-16 - 4:00 p.m.
ELOFTING@HOTMAIL.COM's Christmas Extravangaza, PART I
The Stegosaurus Method of Hair Trimming, Advice that Nobody Asked For
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The stegosaurus method of hair trimming is, I think, a good one. I use it to:
1) Cut my bangs so that they're not all exactly the same length, but kind of look as though they might be (which is how I like my bangs to look).
Step one, cut bangs, straight across, to desired length.
Step two, pull a small section of now-trimmed bangs straight up away from your head and twirl it into a little dinosaur horn.
Step three, pull the little dinosaur horn back down against your forehead and cut the ends off, straight across. The dinosaur horn will be in kind of a weird little bubble at the roots, so cutting off the ends like this makes your bangs all different lengths, but not obviously so. I like it.
Step four, continue making and cutting little dinosaur horns with the rest of your bangs.
2) Put off giving your hair a proper trim for as long as possible while trying to grow it out longer. (My aunt taught me this application of the stegosaurus method.)
Step one, twirl sections of your hair into little dinosaur horns. The hairs that are damaged at the ends won't, for some reason I don't understand (chemistry was my forte back-in-the-day, physics only made me sleepy), be able to keep their feet inside the dinosaur horn, and will come poking out at all kinds of crazy angles.
Step two, go around the dinosaur horn with a pair of scissors, cutting off all wonky, damaged ends. The less hair you twirl into a dinosaur horn, the more OCD you can get with the whole procedure. It's time-consuming, but you can put off a proper haircut almost indefinitely by getting rid of the damaged bits in this way, which is good if that's what you're trying to do.
